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  •  

    Monday, June 09, 2008

    Obama scripture lesson for June 9, 2008. The birth of the Hussein Creed.

    From page 666 of A Short History of Obama

    By Andrew Sullivan
    Professor of Self Hatred Studies at the College of SouthEastern NorthWest Arlington Tech.


    In the 1st month of the J.O. period (Just Obama) the emperor Axelrod gathered the Latte Tribe, the Arugula Tribe, The Champagne Socialists Tribe, the diaspora of Self Hating Gay Men for Obama, and various competing fag hag healers and leaders including Maria of the Shriver and Arianna of the Brentwood. They met in an upscale lounge in Chicago called "Sinclair's". Over a strenuous period of 4 minutes they pounded out a Universal Declaration of Beliefs for Obamites calling it The Hussein Creed - using Obama's given middle name because...well...the Apple Martinis had kicked in and it sort of rhymed with Nicene - so what the hell. Here is what it says:


    The Hussein Creed


    We believe in one Lord, Barry Obama,
    the chosen Son of Daley,
    eternally forgotten by his angry Father,
    And hippie Mother.
    Through Barry
    all things were made.
    For us and for our condescension.
    He came down from Harvard,
    was incarnate of the Spirit of Hyannis port and the Viper Michelle
    and became truly human.
    As was proven in the Pennsylvania Debate.

    He will come in glory to demand the living and the dead,
    get to the polls.
    And trash who ever he feels is in his way,
    while smiling and handing out cash and jobs.

    And his kingdom will have no end.
    Once we take over the military.

    We believe in the Holy Media, the giver of lies,
    who proceeds from the Lord,
    We believe in one holy Democratic and Socialist Church.
    Which we will only attend if the Pastor is
    not videotaped.

    We look for the Resurrection of the Dead
    on voting rolls across swing states.

    And demand tenure at mediocre universities
    with full benefits and down time to
    write for Mother Jones
    and some tiny poetry journals
    and get faded in our Jacuzzis
    and complain about how unfair everything is.

    Now and Forever
    Amen.

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