Astrid explains: How to spot a Hater.

cross posted with johnwsmart.com

Astrid asked to post something tonight. Since L.R. is an open forum I happily agreed.


Astrid explains: How to spot a Hater.
By Astrid Passionfroot.

I am sorry to have to write this post. But certain things have come to my attention and I feel it is my duty to speak up on matters concerning us all and the welfare of the universe. My words are blunt as we may be entering a difficult energy field. My astrological charts indicate that earth is converging into retrograde with the lunar trapezoid of Venus rising in the house of orbiting Neptune on the solar reef of cosmic ring nodes. We all know what THAT means!!! Trouble is brewing!

For example: A friend told my recently that my love for our Barack was misguided. He said I was like a Japanese soldier living in a cave that did not know the war was over. This boggled my mind. Why would a solider from the peaceful land of Japan be at war? Plus, I don't live in a cave. Plus, I'm from Marin County and I live in communion with nature. In a condo.

I knew my friend had become a "hater". So I had to take action! The haters are back! Just as the charts indicated! So I must help fight them any way I can! I said to myself "Astrid, yes I can write a post!" So...this is:

"How to spot a hater! and fight back!

As our Barack moves into his second glorious year as our leader it's important for all of us to stand on guard against the resurgence of the haters. Let's review so we can spot the haters in our neighborhoods, communities and families.

What is a hater?

1. A hater is anyone who questions our most exceptional President in any way - politically, personally or most exspecially: Spiritually.

2. If they are white, haters are racialists no matter what. But if they are persons of color they are just misguided and oppressed. Unless they are conservatives, then they are haters.

3. Women who are haters can also be known as "bitches" or "mothers-in-law" or "whores". It is okay to use these words for clarity and ease.

4. Haters are stupider than normal, Obama people. Haters ask questions like "Is this health care reform a good idea?" How stupid is that? Or "Why are banks getting so much bailout money?" Totally stupid.

5. Haters have secret hater meetings in basements and also different places, like Kmart parking lots and Denny's. At the meetings they offer burnt offerings, which they burn. With fire.

6. When our Barack is on TV, haters watch sports instead.

7. Haters try to pass in everyday life. They dress normal but underneath they have on secret underwear, which is not clean, and contains hand stitched pictures of Sean Hannity.

8. Haters smell like bacon.

9. Haters do not blame everything on George W Bush. This is a dead giveaway since we all know everything is Bush's fault. Some even insist that our Barack is "Bush 3". That is most stupid!!! Our Barack is not from Texas and doesn't live on a ranch. How can they be alike?

10. Haters don't watch Keith Olbermann or Rachel Maddow. And they don't even want to.

11. Haters never go on retreats.

12. Haters don't think Barack should have gotten the Nobel Peace Prize. (That's just crazy talk!) And they don't like cap and trade. I trust Obama so much that I can say I don't really know what cap and trade is but I know it's very excellent. And might have to do with hats. Which are very important. Everyone needs one good hat!

13. Also Haters say big words to try and confuse people. Like "flip-flop" and "gay rights". Don't be fooled! Barack loves the gays. He talks to them. And agrees they should have nice things. I have some gays in my condo complex. Bruce and Gary. I tell them Obama is coming to save them from their empty lives full of racisms and Restoration Hardware debt servitude. Once I even had them over for a snack.

These are my pointers. If you know or see a Hater please report it to the White house web site: Rahmisgoingtotakeyouawayinthenight.gov.

It is sad to report that I've heard reports that some former people of Obama's light have become haters. The pull of the haters is strong and pungent, like a nice old lady who makes cookies or yoga gas. I hope this helps to spot those who want to stop the marvelous progress we've made in 2009. The glorious time of renewal and transformation with Our Barack can only continue if we are vigilant against the haters! Beware!

And always remember Barack Obama came to save us...from the haters! Let's stand firm and do whatever Barack says! Just like it's 2008 all over again!