Lunch Break - POTUS schedule for today, Bill M rips BHO a new one, and some gay stuff.

Obama's schedule for June 16th announced by White House:

6:15am - Obama works out with Michelle at WH gym. Personal treadmill testers will warm up for the Obamas at 6:05.

7:00 - Obama's shower tester to enter shower to ensure proper water temp.

7:05 - Obama to shower. POTUS scheduled to soap up and rinse without out valet or White House lawyer for first time today.

7:30 - Breakfast with family in residence. Both Obama daughters set to pester him about about upcoming slumber party. Obama to respond with usual "just let me eat my waffle."

8:00 - Obama to overhaul financial regulations.

8:15 - Obama to overhaul healthcare regulations.

8:20 - Obama to overhaul CEO pay.

8:21 - Obama to overhaul education, the Fed, Wall Street, Main Street, Sunset Blvd between Dodger Stadium and the Arby's next to the creepy iCarly/SpongeBob mural in Hollywood, The Department of Motor Vehicles in all 57 states, and Joe Biden.

8:22 - Obama to announce members of the Admin's committee to rework the second law of thermodynamics and consolidate Special and General Relativity to cut down on overhead costs and redundancy, saving approximately 11 dollars and 52 cents.

8:30 - Obama to declare Michelle "Czar" of outlet malls. Directing her to overhaul outlet malls around the nation, insisting outlets be combined with Indian gaming casinos wherever possible to consolidate travel and cut down on green house gas emissions.

8:33 - Obama to pass by Larry Summers office and poke him with a stick from the hallway to wake him up.

9:45 - Obama to chair meeting of National Security Council in short sleeves to show he's a relaxed kind of guy.

Main agenda items

"How to continue to give all work to Hillary while taking credit whenever possible."

and

" Should POTUS issue apology to French for Ben Franklin's gas?"

Also something about Iran and North Korea.

3:00 - Obama to appear on Dr. Phil and - in a jovial manner- order that Dr. Phil get a pedicure, thanking all pedicurists for their invaluable contribution to American life and ensuring that they won't be forgotten in the budget process.

4:00 Townhall meeting in Peoria, Arizona to announce who will play him in his biopic on Lifetime - Hugh Laurie or Vanessa Williams?!

4:10 Townhall in Crouton-on-Hudson, New York to show his favorite clips from The Mod Squad and to announce who will play Michelle in the upcoming biopic on Lifetime: Hugh Laurie or Mellisa Ethridge?!

4:30 Townhall in Hilo, Hawaii on "The Art and Science of Blaming Predecessors" also to insist that he has no look-a-likes. He really is everywhere, all the time.

5:00 State Dinner for Prime Minister of some European country no one gives a shit about anymore. Obama to be on phone with Chinese Ambassador throughout meal begging Beijing not to sell dollars. Customary toast to be made by new White House Food Taster, George Clooney.

6:00 Michelle and Barack to commence Date Night. First a private dinner at a Oprah's Santa Barbara home, then a preview of a multicultural revival of Tennessee Williams "A Streetcar Named Desire" called:

"W.T.F. is that white women cryin' 'bout when the Mayan Calender sez the world is about to end and my sugah diabe-tes is messin with my head... and the rainbow is enuf."

Subtitled: A meditation on Colonialism, Socialism, global warming,
FEMA, lemurs, 9/11, racism, sexism, Shirley Chisholm,
Don Draper, Wet Naps, wet dreams, end times mythology,
breakfast cereal, pre stone age henges, and Jesus.

By Tony Kushner.

11:45: Sandman to visit POTUS.




Other stuff:

When even the resident pot head at HBO knows you're a fraud it means the Kool Aid Kegger is finally winding down:




Gay marriage reception: D.C. moving along - in the right direction, Ex NY Senate Leader moves toward equality: The 80-year-old Republican, who retired last year as the state's most powerful Republican, tells The Associated Press he now sees the issue as a civil right. "As a Republican, I believe in personal freedom,"....read the rest.