Heart of Darkness

The Obamanation has found me out.

You've uncovered my secret plan.

Yes, it's true. I've been a closeted right wing nut job my whole life.

When I voted for Mel King in 1983 I was starting down my nefarious path. Vote for the black man in Boston. That will throw them off the scent.

The next step in my plot was working for George McGovern in the 1984 primaries. Yes, it gave me keen insight into the left wing mindset.

After he bowed out I pretended to be upset and went to work for Walter Mondale. Cheering wildly at a campaign rally in Connecticut where Geraldine Ferraro was the speaker - false - so false. I was crying inside.

I may have said horrible things about Ronald Reagan, like how dare you call ketchup a vegetable just to cheat poor children out of a healthy school lunch? I may have cursed James Watt for selling out the environment or criticized Ed Meese for being a criminal. I might have protested in Boston against Reagan. I never voted for him but that was just a ruse.

Sure I knocked on doors for Bill Clinton. Danced in the streets of West Hollywood when he won. Went to both inaugurations.

Worked for Gore in Florida. Screamed like a banshee when NPR announced that he had won Florida. Lost my mind when Fox took it away. Stayed up all night waiting for the announcement. Called every public official in Florida to protest. Actions, just actions.

Volunteered for the Kerry campaign and donated money. Held my nose and voted for him. Hated Bush that much.

I've worked against Adam Putnam since I moved here to Polk County. Tried to get the DCCC to run someone against him. Ended up volunteering for some strange candidates but took the anybody but Putnam course.

Worked for Bill Nelson, donated money, met with him.

You can see that I am pure evil. I am almost as evil as Karl Rove with my dastardly planning. Waiting patiently for this moment to reveal myself. Everything I've done politically for the last twenty-some years has led to this. My opportunity to vote against an unqualified Democrat.

I can't believe I've gotten away with it so long. Railing endlessly against GWB and his merry band on this blog has provided me cover.

But the Obamanation is too strong - they have found me out! They have revealed what I, and thousands others, have been trying to hide.

Ah, the relief! No longer living in the shadows, afraid that any wrong move would out me, finally over.

I'll say it loud, I'll say it proud. I will not vote for the unqualified Democratic candidate that is Obama.